Ignore those who try to discourage you.

It is not a simple task to ignore those who are trying to discourage us from pursuing our dreams.  Their intentions are generally well-meant and their arguments tend to make “sense”, but the fact remains that it is OUR dream and not theirs, and as such they will always fail to recognize the importance of it. 

When we pursue our dreams, something unavoidable happens; it affects everyone around us.  You might think this is a positive aspect of our work, but it almost always has a negative impact for one very specific reason; if we succeed in achieving our dream it proves that they can to.  Let’s face it, the world is FULL of people with failed or abandoned dreams and they don’t want to know that they’ve walked away from something that could’ve changed their lives.  But more to the core, they don’t want you to succeed when they themselves have failed.  You’d think, if they loved us or cared about us, the opposite would be true; that they would want to see us succeed even more than ever, but that isn’t the way the human psyche works.  Instead, when we’ve failed, we want to “protect” the ones we love from experiencing the same heart break and disappointment that we have had to deal with.  And so, the very people who aught to be encouraging us to continue in our pursuit of joy, fulfillment and a sense of contentment, are the very ones who try to keep us from it.

The tools most often employed against us are: shame for being so self-centered, guilt for not being satisfied, chastisement for not being “realistic”, and fear about where failure would leave us.  And believe me, these are powerful, powerful tools designed to elicit a whole range of emotions that will threaten to undermine our resolve, and cause us to question our actions and intention. 

·         Whatever you do, you need courage. Whatever course you decide upon, there is always someone to tell you that you are wrong. There are always difficulties arising that tempt you to believe your critics are right. To map out a course of action and follow it to an end requires some of the same courage that a soldier needs. Peace has its victories, but it takes brave men and women to win them.

Ralph Waldo Emerson

·         I owe my success to having listened respectfully to the very best advice, and then going away and doing the exact opposite.

G. K. Chesterton

·         A leader must have the courage to act against an expert’s advice.

James Callaghan

When we recognize that these tools are meant to manipulate us by those who are either threatened by our pursuit of happiness, or those who wish to spare us the pain and heartbreak of failure, the tools no longer hold any power over us.  Choosing to ignore those who discourage us is not fool-hearty, it is absolutely imperative!  Those who are unwilling to step out on their own despite the warnings and advice against doing so, will never achieve anything more than regret, discontentment, and much resentment.

~ by bechalem on November 13, 2006.